Saturday, 29 March 2014

Having a NSman as boyfriend

I've heard a lot of hype like, 
"its unbearable to be with a boy in army"
"boys in army is going to lose their girlfriends"

So... is it really true that it's tough being with someone serving the NS?
Or is it just a fluke and it's as easy as 1+1?

In this post, I'm going to talk about guys GENERALLY.
However, I will share some personal experience and some experience my friends have.

NSman boyfriend Myths Busted.

#01 NS boyfriends tend to neglect their girlfriends.
My opinion - I think sometimes they tend to do so, but most of the time not.

What do you think of the verb, "Neglect"?
I feel that neglecting someone is when you don't put in the effort to place your attention on someone.
Well, I feel that many boyfriends in NS tend to try their best to put their attention on their girlfriends to the best they can.
During Basic Military Training, the 2 weeks that your boyfriend cant see you or meet you, it's when you can see they put their minds into thinking of you. (and sometimes their parents)
They are bounded but they still love you, they try their best to meet you and tries to let you feel loved as much as possible.
I don't think that they neglect their girlfriends but instead, they grow to pay more effort into giving attention to their girlfriends instead.

#02 NS boyfriends rather go out with their "buddies" on weekends than spending time with their girlfriends.
My opinion - Its quite difficult to allocate time within that 2 tiny and inconsiderable days between family, buddies and girlfriend. Lets say if you, as a girl, only have 2 days to spend time with your family, buddies and boyfriend, which will you choose? I think that this is a very difficult question to answer. It is the same for your boyfriends!

Lets say, 1 week they chose to spend time with you, their parents are sacrificed, their "brothers" would complain. Another week, the same cycle. It's really tough for them to do so.
As a girlfriend myself, I would try my best to spend time with him and have lunch with his "buddies" then have dinner with his family. The time we have together might somehow be sacrificed, especially, I choose to go to church on Saturdays, but we still try to maximise our time spent together. The time that I use to go to church, he would use it for his extended rest. Ohya, and boys in army are ALWAYS tired.

#03 NS boyfriends suffers from PMS (I have to agree)
My opinion - YES. They do.

When their superior "tekan" them, its really difficult for them to still smile at you as if nothing happened. If they do so, they're really professional at being hypocritical. If you get scolding from your boss/ have a tiff with your friends/ quarreled with your parents, won't your face show as well? I really sympathise with boys in army, their opinions are almost-never heard in camp, once they book out, they want to have a chance to rant and complain. Yet they can't, people would judge.

Moreover, some girlfriends will just scream at them, complaining about....

GF "Eh I take out all my sat and sun for you sia, you cannot smile a bit?"
BF *ignore* *poker face*
GF "Shit, I have enough of you, why are you doing this to me?"
BF *internal turmoil* *can't take it* *wanna quarrel* *choose not to* *remain silent*
GF "Enough is enough, I'm going home, bye"
BF "Bye" *heart breaks* *feels terrible* *needs validation*
At night,
GF (Clubbing with friends) and BF (Drinking at a Pub)
Next day,
GF *shit, he can go pub cannot accompany me ah*
BF *why the hell she go club*
(the above is fully fabricated)

I'm not saying that all girlfriends/boyfriends are like that, but this is what usually happens.
Girlfriends hope to receive attention that BF cant give.
As a girlfriend, I just hope to receive some kind of validation when I make the effort to meet him and I hope that he would be happy. But sometimes, it's just not possible to get what we want all the time...

I'll just stop here for today! 
So... will you still blame him for any of the above?


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